Asher Banning’s HomeBirth Story

“Wonderful are Your works, and that my soul knows very well..You already checked for me, I’m Your work of art!”

This was my 2^nd pregnancy that God announced to me. =) In August, one night at church, I went up for prayer and one of the ladies praying with me said, “All I’m getting is that your womb is full.” Later we tested and found out we were pregnant. . .

And so began Asher Banning Seppala. The news of our new baby came the same week of my Grandma Marilynn’s Memorial service. Amazing to note that little Asher resembles his Grandma Marilynn and her son, my father. 

This pregnancy was a wild ride. I took on many baby projects and started nesting the minute I found out we were expecting. I felt like Asher would be coming early and was prepared for his arrival pretty much after 36 weeks. Little did I know he would arrive almost 2 months later at what may have been 44 weeks gestation. My earnest expectations that he would come early did not support the prolonged waiting period. This waiting period was one of the hardest, most emotional and trying times of my life. I can’t count how many meltdowns I had. Physically I was at my lowest at about 39 weeks. I pulled a muscle in my back from a normal movement and couldn’t move without severe pain. On top of my back pain I had pressure on my sciatic nerve that affected my walking. I was afraid I would go into labor and have to make it through labor pains with all of the other pain in my body. God is gracious! I didn’t go into labor then. In fact, all of the pain that I had from pregnancy was comforted by 40 to 40and ½ weeks. I was actually my most comfortable at around 43.

As the days without labor pains continued to pass, my excitement about having a baby went with them. I was beginning to think there wasn’t a baby to be had. I woke up at 4 am one morning, came out to my living room and just sat with God. He reminded me about a scripture that had been on the tip of my tongue for awhile but I didn’t quite know it. I looked up Isaiah 66:9 “Shall I bring to the birth and not cause to bring forth? Shall I cause to bring forth and shut the womb says our God?”  To bring forth means to bear young, to hatch, to labor, medically to act as midwife, to be delivered of a child.  Wow, there was a baby inside me that God was assuring me would be born. Other parts of this chapter built me up, verse 12, “ I will extend peace to her like a river and the glory of the nations like an overflowing stream, then you will be nursed, carried on her hip and trotted, lovingly bounced up and down on her [God’s maternal ] knees.” And this peace was what I needed to endure the next four to five days still waiting for my son “to hatch.” I can’t leave out this verse7, “Before Zion travailed she gave birth; before her pain came upon her, she was delivered of a child.” The word travail is described as such; to twist or whirl in a circular or spiral manner, to dance, writhe in pain(especially of child birth), shapen, trust, wait carefully (patiently). I was so encouraged looking up these meanings, especially travail and how it pictures dancing.  After I wrote the meanings in my journal I also wrote, “This is going to be fun!”

Castor oil, to take or not to take? Castor oil is a laxative that some women take to try to induce labor. Castor oil makes you poop a ton and can start contractions and labor if you are well enough effaced. There were two separate times that this debate crossed my mind. Sunday night, the week prior to my actual delivery I bought myself some castor oil, along with some honeycombs. Honeycombs serve no inducing purpose; they are just good for the weary soul. I was believing for a gentle birth, so the idea of making myself poop a ton to get there did not set well with me. I was feeling pressure from everyone except the baby to get this baby out. I wanted to wait and let him come when he was ready. I knew that if I took the oil, I would always wonder when he would have come himself if I had waited, and that was a greater intrigue than escaping my pregnant and waiting circumstance. The oil remains on my counter unopened and free to the first person who asks.

Friday June 1^st came, passing up our due dates May 5^th and May 13^th. The baby I thought I’d be holding the beginning of May was still in my belly.  I had a prenatal, baby was doing great, so was I. Grandma checked me and I was dilated to a 5 and completely effaced! Phew, progress! Then Saturday went and I thought Sunday had, too.  As I went to lay in bed at about 11:30 pm, I placed my hand below my belly and pain began to radiate in that area. I had to get up to try to walk around! Ouch. Is this labor? Could it be?! About 2 to 3 minutes later another pain came on me, then again before 11:42. Three contractions within ten minutes, that were definitely long enough to convince me I was in labor. I woke Roman up and said I think I’m in labor! “Are you serious?!” He replied. And so the wild ride began.

 From this point I was attempting to call my parents between contractions. Roman was calling our Grandma midwife, calling in to work, timing my contractions, filling up the birth tub AND trying to find something I could puke in. Contractions were becoming more intense and closer together, with some peaks overlapping! “Are you done with that one?”-Roman “I think I started another on top of it!”-Heidi. I was not at all in control of what was going on in my body! I literally puked and saw red stars floating around my head. My body was weak and shaky and ….this… was my transition.  My parents arrived and started helping. The tub was ready and I was READY for the tub! As soon as I could get a breather from my contractions I would get in! As soon as I got into the birth tub I felt instant relief in my body, no more shaking, puking, etc. I had 2 mild contractions and one of my midwives arrived, then 2 wild ones that felt like my body was ready to push! I was instructed to see if I could feel his head yet and if I could then I could push. When I felt for his head he was seriously less than two inches in. Here we go baby! I was stoked! I was so focused on pushing I didn’t really know what was going on around me! AS I started to push, I could hear my Grandma Midwife’s voice in my head coaching me, along with trusting my past experience with Ezekiel’s birth. I was gently but surely pushing this awesome baby out. At one point Asher was even moving his head helping to come out. I birthed his head and during the same contraction birthed his body, remembering how easily the body comes out! Within about four contractions, my baby boy was out! I pulled him up out of the water and placed him on my legs. My two main midwives walked in the room as he was coming out of the water!

 From my first contraction to his birth was about 1 hour and 45 minutes. Honestly the whole thing felt like a half hour. I’m surprised it was almost 2 hours.

 There you go,..My sweet Baby boy Asher Banning Seppala came like the wind. He came SUDDENLY! Yeah the wait was long, but his amazing birth made up for the melt downs, the physical pregnancy pain and dashed expectations. Pushing was literally pleasant and rewarding. Recovery has also been speedy.

 Kudos to you if you’ve read this far! If you are expecting a baby yourself, I bless you with an amazing pregnancy, labor and delivery! You are birthing an eternal being that you co-created with Papa God! I pray your experience will be like a dance, fun and invigorating! 

Your baby will bring a special grace to your family! Don’t be afraid to ask God what your child will be like even while they are in the womb. It’s pretty cool what He will reveal to you.

If you are just plain waiting for something, a promise, new job, anything good, keep waiting. Trust! Hope! Remind yourself of what’s been promised to you, and experience how faithful Papa is who promised it. He will be your refuge, your safe place, your Hope. He will bring you to your desired haven. And what good is a haven if you have not been through the storm?

 Love, one proud mama and proud daughter, Heidi Lynne Seppala

 

Heidi and the Raw Food Bar

I just finished reading a very cute manga called Kitchen Princess, in which the main character is named Najika. Each chapter is named according to the recipe she makes during that chapter. Najika and Flan, Najika and Peach Pie and Najika and Rainbow Jelly, etc. Najika is notorious for remaking recipes she has tried, even if she has only tasted them once. She has an impeccable sense of taste and absolutely loves to cook! Well my night reminded me of Najika. I spent the evening trying to remake my favorite raw food bar. I have had the ingredients for a while but have put it off, afraid of failing.
I feel like most of my life I have struggled with the fear of failure. Through school I would procrastinate on ALL and I mean all of my projects till the very last minute and hurry to complete them on time. I remember staying up miserably till about 2 or 3 in the morning starting and finishing a history assignment due the next day. I still managed to ace about everything I did. However, seeing my scores was a double edged sword. I was relieved and glad that I could get such a grade, but disappointed in the effort I put into it, imagining what it really could have been like had I given it my all and started sooner.
 It is OK to make mistakes. I have many times had to give myself permission to do so. I, as well as many of you, grew up with parents who were perfectionists. I would give my friends tours of my mother's kitchen cabinets to show them the labels facing forward and stacked all upright. She's amazingly neat. I still hustle to clean when my father comes over to visit (although he has relaxed a lot) but still invite him to fold the clothes piled up in my love seat if they're bothering him. hehe. This pile has become a reoccurring decoration. I ended up abandoning all order because I felt I couldn't "measure up." I am trying to regain some order while still taking time to rest, enjoy my life, my husband, and my son in the middle of our almost clean apartment that I love.
There is a quote I am still trying to find, but this one is most like it, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us."
I am putting my life back in order from the inside out. De-cluttering old beliefs and thinking that have taken up residence in my heart for far too long. They have stifled my joy, and robbed me of enjoying my journey in life. I am rediscovering dreams and dreaming again. And taking opportunities that if I gave them a second thought I would probably turn down because of fear. I'm learning to risk! Risk-when I looked this word up, it said; exposure to the chance of injury or loss. That meaning was wildly negative and disappointing to me. When I think of taking risks now, I think of the opportunity of going through the experience and maybe even triumphing during it. Our children are a great example of this. They are reckless. They have to be taught fear. My son's new thing is climbing on/conquering everything! He doesn't worry about gravity or anything else. He is risking daily and most of the time succeeding at his risks.
So, after much hand mixing and taste testing I finished my Raw Food Bar Remake. It's still in the fridge hardening, but I've nibbled on a piece to find that I was almost successful. It tastes a lot like my favorite raw food bar, but still needs tweaking, just...like...me.
Learn to risk, give yourself permission to fail, know that your potential is far greater than anything you've done up to this point and even goes further than what you can accomplish in this life. You are brilliant!

Here is my Recipe for the Raw Food Bar if you are interested: I would add a little more protein powder to yours though so that it is stiffer,at least another scoop. 
16 oz Cashew Butter
12 or about 1&1/2 cups Medjool Dates (pitted)
3/4 cups Raw Agave Nectar
1/2 scoop Rice Protein Powder-the scoops that come with the powder (you can try a diff. protein powder)
1 Tbls flax seeds(optional)
1/4 cup raw cashew pieces ( you can use less)
1/4 cup mini semi sweet chocolate chips or carob chips
3 Tbls dried shredded coconut (optional)

In a mixing bowl mash the dates with the cashew butter. Add agave and stir. Add protein powder and stir. Add flax seeds, cashew pieces, choc chips and coconut and stir till well blended or mix with hands =). Pat into a wax paper covered 9/13 inch pan until smooth and flat. It doesn't have to cover the whole pan. Cover with wax paper and refrigerate overnight. Cut into bars and keep refrigerated.
If you want to try what these taste like before making them. You can find one at Whole Foods, in the bar section, the brand i like is Raw Organic Food bar, Chocolate or Chocolate Coconut.

This is Me....

I am a 24 yr old wife and mother in both realms. I am a deep well. I seek the ultimate experience in whatever I  do. I don't know exactly where to start, except to say I am full, and this is me, pouring myself out.